Want to know about the most common divorce reasons?
Although there are no single divorce reasons, we took a look at what divorce lawyers and divorce statistics say about the break up of marriages.
California divorce lawyer Jamie Kurtz studied 295 couples who were married for at least 7 years before filing for divorce, according to a July 2020 online article in DevDiscourse.
About 40% of them cited dissatisfaction with marital relations — their spouses were unwilling to change.
Meanwhile, some people see the second marriage as a new beginning, but this is not always the case.
As per statistics of Wilkinson and Finkbeiner Family Law Attorneys, 60% of couples in second marriages and 73% of third marriages are also in divorce in the United States. Meanwhile, 41% of first-time marriages end in divorce.
The law firm also said 2020 may be the largest single-year increase in divorce in decades and the increase may be attributed to the COVID-19 pandemic.
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Family lawyers say getting professional marriage counselling help early on is important to keep the marriage intact.
Another option is to attend a reputable couples workshop such as the Gottman Marriage Workshop, Imago Workshop or Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Retreat. But what exactly is “dissatisfaction with marital relations,” as reported by Kurtz’s study?
Here is a 7 Common Causes of Divorce Reasons:
Couples who divorce often cite incompatibility as the “catch-all” reason for the break up. Incompatibility stems from racial, national and religious contradictions, as well as differences in upbringing and mentality; and conflicting ideas about raising children, the distribution of responsibilities in the family, finances, and even different political views.
Extramarital affairs are another reason behind divorce filings. When one partner breaches the trust with a sexual or emotional affair, the pain may not be repairable. The American Psychology Association states that 20% to 40% of couples in the United States split-up because of infidelity.
3: Communication Gap
Good communication is the basis of strong relationships. Sometimes, people tend to get so busy with their careers and children that they forget to give their spouse time. This can cause communication gaps between couples, resulting in misunderstandings and conflicts.
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About 29% of marriages break up because of physical, mental or emotional abuse. Abuse includes derogatory comments, controlling behavior, and sexual or physical violence.
5: Lack of Intimacy
Intimacy and sex indeed play a vital role in maintaining the marriage relationship. The lack of physical connection is the early sign of an impending storm.
According to Denise A. Donnelly, associate professor of sociology at Georgia State University, 15% of sexless marriages end in 6 months to 1 year. The absence of sex divides the couple, which eventually kills the relationship.
6: Regular Arguments
Marriage is not always the bed of roses, and minor arguments are completely normal in a relationship. But in some cases, arguments and disagreements can give rise to anger and heated, ongoing fights, which can lead to a marriage collapse.
Alcohol abuse, drug abuse or porn addiction can destroy a marriage and family unit. The addiction detrimentally affects finances, jobs and children’s well-being. Many times, the addictive spouse will lie, steal and become abusive.
A group of family lawyers and divorce mediators teamed up with marriage therapists to create the DRI Alliance for Marriage and Divorce Professionals to assist couples to preserve their marriages or guide a family-friendly divorce when divorce is imminent.
Therapists, mediators and lawyers who are members of the DRI Alliances are trained to help couples discern whether or not proceed with a divorce.
The group recommends seeking therapists who specialize in couples counselling at the first signs of trouble.
The Gottman Institute, a research group that studies relationships, also says couples live far too long in misery before getting professional help. In fact, couples wait about 7 years before enlisting therapy.
At the very least, the Institute says, attend a couples workshop yearly as a way to reconnect and check-up on your relationship.
Quick Note: address marriage issues with the help of a professional as soon as possible.
About The Author: Sunny Skousen is an experienced writer who has over 20 years of experience in ghostwriting, blogging, journalism, speech writing, and content marketing. She specializes in writing about Couples Therapy, Family Therapy, Faith-Based Counseling, Anxiety Disorders, Mood Disorders, Grief/Loss and Trauma, Supervision and Consultation, and more!